Alhamdulillah, all praises to Allah for still giving me TODAY for an opportunity to seek for Allah's forgiveness and blessings..Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah...
How gratitude I am to Allah, I couldn't express it in words
*loss of words temporarily*
Before I talk about the knowledge I gained, I'd rather talk about my journey to gain this PRECIOUS GIFT from Allah, BeingME conference...
In conclusion, what I got from BeingME is much much more than just knowledge...I don't actually know how Rasulullah pbuh really felt when He was gifted with Israk and Mikraj but I can actually imagine how the feeling is like..
Just imagine the sorrow, the pain of losing people you love sooooooo much continuously..you're in
DEAD END..you've almost reached your limit then you were gifted with something MORE VALUABLE than anything... Well, more valuable is an understatement..PRECIOUS, nothing can compare to it..well, even precious also seem like an understatement for me...this is how I imagined Rasulullah pbuh were feeling when he was granted with Israk Mikraj...
That's exactly how I would describe my feeling after the conference..
[too much of negativity to put it clearly without the dash...=_=']
Well, it did not seem that HARD when I listed it down..but, the feeling I was feeling back there was too much to bear..I lost my grip to Allah suddenly...Not that he left me behind, it was me who ran away...I was being rebellious inside, questioning what He want to tell me actually...T_T
[70:19] "Verily, man (disbeliever) was created very impatient "
Until, one of my sahabah (may all the blessings from Allah be upon him,Aminnn) shared this hadith with me..
The prophets and righteous people are afflicted the most, and their rewards are the highest. Sa'd (RA) reported that the Prophet (SAW) said: " The most in their suffering among the people are the prophets, then the best, then the (next) best. One is afflicted in accordance with his deen (faith). If his deen is firm his affliction is hard, and if his deen is weak, his affliction is light. Indeed, one would be so much subjected to adversity until he walks among the people without any sins. " [Ahmad, Tirmithee]
After that, I started to regain back my strength. I went to Islamic talks, I read lots of Islamic books and I searched on the internet what I needed, videos, blog poses or whatever necessary to raise up my Imaan..that's what I hope at least..and I think it does, but it's just not enough for me to take ACTION
Then, I saw the commercial of BeingME on televison, Al-Hijrah channel..At the moment, deep down I had this one feeling..It's a feeling of wanting something so badly that you just can't move on if you don't get it..It was that kind of feeling..But, I saw the date and I thought,
"Indeed, Allah is the BEST planner"
Exactly the day before the conference (29th June) only I started to frantically searching for a ticket...[my fault since I didn't do it earlier, serves me right...=_=']
Alhamdulillah..after quite a hard work, I managed to get a ticket for myself..
Alhamdulillah..this can only be possible due to Allah, due to HIS Rahman and Rahim..
Thank you sooo much Allah, for this gift...
[to be continued]